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A Perfect Valentine's Day

Many of us dread Valentine’s Day. Especially those of us who are single. I even know some friends in relationships who hate this holiday, apparently because it’s a lot of weird, unnecessary pressure to create this perfect day. After all, why do we need chocolate, flowers, cheesy teddy bears, and fancy dinners to validate our love for one another.

We don’t.

But that’s not the point of my writing today. Today, while daydreaming at work, I was thinking about ways to get through Valentine’s Day while being incredibly single—and I mean incredibly single. It wasn’t too hard to think of things, because after all, I was at work. It did feel like just another Wednesday.

I tried to think of being single on Valentine’s Day in a more positive light. For many of us, it’s easy to say we hate this day, make self-deprecating jokes about it, or join others in mocking the holiday. But today, I tried to deal with this situation in a more positive manner.

One thing that made me happy, and this may seem silly, is the prospect of super cheap chocolate in stores tomorrow. My friends and I already made plans to go shopping and buy discounted Valentine’s Day chocolate. I think I’m more excited for these plans than I would be for any date, honestly.

Another thing we can do, and this one may seem obvious, but it's important enough to mention time and time again, is take this day to remind ourselves that self-love and self-care are so important. I Googled “how to get through Valentine’s Day while single,” for inspiration, and found a great article called “How to Survive Being Single on Valentine’s Day” from Huffington Post, the Canada edition. One thing the author, Marcia Sirota, mentions in the article that I think is extremely important is, “there’s no substitute for self-love.”

She explains that it’s important to learn to love yourself before you can go looking for a romantic partner. She says, "With self-love, you won't feel the burning need for someone else to compensate for the lack of love in your life. If you do meet someone, your relationship will be based on caring and sharing, rather than needing the other person to fill a void inside you.” I think a lot of us imagine that there is a void we need to fill on Valentine’s Day. But why can’t we be our own Valentines?

The last way I thought about to try and view being single on Valentine’s Day in a positive light is appreciating the love and happiness around me. Instead of hating or being jealous of others for being in happy relationships, I want to try and be happy for these people and be inspired by their love and companionship. For many of us, that’s the goal, right? Today is a great day to spread love and happiness to our families, friends, and everyone around us. And today is a great day to love ourselves. Ditch the negative V-Day vibes.

Real Talk.

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