Dear Daughter- What I Didn’t Get to Say
“I’m bleeding!” I said to my mother. She frantically runs out of the room, “We need a doctor, a nurse, somebody.” I faintly heard her. I laid there as so many thoughts crossed my mind. The previous day, I knew it was over. I didn’t want it to be, but I knew it. Things had really taken a turn for the worse. I was so sad inside and looked like a sad puppy dog with my big brown eyes. I was just full of sadness. My life was in shambles!
Am I sad, am I angry, how do I feel?
Some days I feel as if life isn’t worth it.
Overwhelmed with pain and grief,
Feelings I wouldn’t bestow on my worst enemy.
“What do I do,” I cry to the Lord?
A testament of my faith, a true statement of my soul.
I still believe, I just wish, oh a sigh of relief.
I’m still alive, still have my family and wits.
Have to be grateful, but oh does my heart ache.
Lord please guide me and help me keep my faith.
I can make it, I know I can.
I feel my strength returning,
Unfortunately, my heart is still yearning.
Please continue to watch over me, help me find myself.
I’m lost Lord, oh I feel so lost.
Help me find my way Lord and let faith be my sword.
Charlene will always be special to me, you’re my little angel.
I miss you dearly…Mommy’s baby.
You were going to be my singer and my dancer…You were going to be so sweet.
Sweet pea watch over mommy, help me get my strength.
You’ll have younger siblings to keep. I know you’ll be there. I miss you baby.
Mommy loves you always XOXO.
Sleep in Peace 10/22/2009
To be continued…